Last month I was invited to an art exhibition by an acquaintance. One of those evening events at a gallery where some DJ plays, drinks are served, and new art gets it’s debut showing. Some of these are quite formal and some aren’t. This was one of the latter. My friend that invited me said to come along but “try not to dress so old”.
Which made me think.
I went through my wardrobe and started really looking at it. Since I had begun working from home, about four years ago, I had pretty much given up on fashion. Back in the 90s I had kept up on these things but back then I tended to go out a lot and for some reason it was important to be up to date and in sync with everyone else. When I started to get more serious about work I kind of forgot all about these things. Then I started working from home and I just opted to do the basics.
For the most part I’m part of the blue jeans and t-shirt crowd now. Most of my other clothes are really just office wear from the days I used to go into work. What’s worse is that as I was fatter then, most of the clothes I have from that era are becoming unmanageably loose and baggy. An odd problem to have. I really don’t have anything that would be “fashionable” or that fits for matter. So off I go to buy clothes.
The local mall. I try to stay away from here as much as possible. It’s a place for teenagers and for those that love shopping. Neither describes me. I initially go with my instincts. The big department stores. I enter an old reliable store that I’ve been going to for ages. Off to one corner is the men’s department. Already I see a bad omen. A white-haired old fellow buying a shirt that looks like something that I would buy. Starting to think that my friend was right.
I head out into the mall. I don’t normally pay attention to any of the small stores in here. I have a sort of mental filter that allows me to ignore all of these and lets me traverse the mall without paying any mind to these. This time however these are exactly what I need to look at right now so down come the filters and I start looking back and forth.
I go into one. It’s filled to bursting with teenagers and twentysomethings, the lighting is dim and they’re playing loud music in the background. More of a party than anything else. Not good, so I back out.
I pass another store whose CEO declared that he was only going to sell to really skinny people so I don’t even bother going in.
Keep wandering through the mall, looking left and right. Dodging round large clusters of people ambling along at a slow pace. One thing I do like about malls is the chance to dodge and weave around traffic. It’s somewhat of a challenge to get around these big slow-moving formations that would keep you from getting to where you want to go. so I zip in and around looking for the tiniest passageway that I can find to get around people.
But then I remember that the point here is to look so I slow my pace down appropriately. Do people really do this for fun?
I wander into another store. Looking at the clothes I get a bad feeling already. I spot one of the sales clerks at a distance and he spots me. I move my hands down my broad form and ask a question “Hmmmm???” and then look up at him. He frowns, shakes his head and replies “hmmmm…” I shrug and thank him “hmmm” and go back into the mall.
Obviously the boutique stores are going to be of no help to me. I continue on and go into another department store. The men’s department is on the second floor. I’m amazed to see just as many women shopping here as there are men.
They have a better selection of casual wear and it seems to be for the younger set so I’m hopeful. I look over the first rack of pants I find. I look at the price tag. My eyes must be going so I blink hard and re-read the price. Again something must be wrong. Maybe I need new glasses more than I need new clothes. So I take them off and read the price a third time but it was right. $125 for one pair of pants.
Now I remember that these types of clothes were ridiculously overpriced back in the 90s too. I try to think of what I have spent $125 on recently. A cut glass and hand decorated vase for a Christmas gift. I got a massage at a world-class spa last year that was around that price. One of the tires on my car is worth about that much and that will last me about 40,000 miles. Yet they want me to spend that much on a piece of cloth that will probably be out of style next month?
I return to the first department store. I pick out something similar to my office wear but in a smaller size. I also only buy one set of new clothes. I will probably be dropping down another size or two by the end of the year (at least I hope so) so there is no point in buying more right now. I will come back later after I’ve had the chance to better appraise the situation.
As for the art exhibition? I ended up not going and went to see a play instead but it was a worthwhile exercise anyways.
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