I have always been the listener in the relationship. No matter what the relationship is. I am always open to listen to the other person no matter what their problem is or who they are. I have listened to my parents concerns, my friend’s fears, my (back then) S.O.’s hopes, and a stranger’s lament.
Why they open up to me I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I don’t mind and never judge. It’s one thing to keep a thought locked up in your mind, even talking to yourself lacks something. But telling that thought to someone else. That’s some sort of release for them, or maybe a balm.
Sometimes the relief is so palpable that I can see them visibly relax, the tension draining from their frame. They can go about their lives or they can then make a decision that was till then stalled in their mind. They don’t necessarily want me to say anything or make up their mind for them. They just want to bounce those thoughts off another living person.
I don’t speak much but I do pay attention. I sit forward and keep them in the center of my gaze. They feel safe and the center of attention and that’s really all that they want. They know I won’t interrupt them and steer the topic away from something that they don’t want to discuss.
Sometimes they share everyday concerns and sometimes they share darker problems. That’s when I feel like Dante walking through hell and having all the lost souls confess the sins that brought them there. Sometimes it’s hard but I don’t judge. They put their faith in me. They have opened up to me and need me to act as a sounding board and nothing more. it is a rare honor that they bestow upon me and I don’t take it lightly.
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